Family Update - All is Well

Apparently I haven't posted since Dad's traumatic header down a flight of stairs on August 8th. He and my daughter were attending a birthday party for a long-time friend of Dad's. The party was held in their church basement. As Dad and Deb were leaving, they climbed a flight of stairs and Deb told Dad to wait and she would grab their jackets. While he was waiting, he apparently became dizzy and took a dive down about eight steps, face forward and head down, coming to a stop on the landing.

To make a long story much shorter, he spent three days in ICU and ten days at a rehab center. He has had home health care since that time, mostly due to a large wound on his leg that is slow in healing. He is diabetic and healing this wound is a major consideration. Thankfully, the wound care people are taking good care of him.

David's Visit

The second major event this fall was the visit by my other daughter, Barb, and her son David. You will see his picture in the previous post. They stayed for approximately two weeks, and were missed before they even left the driveway. Texas is a long way from Michigan, and we have no idea when we will see them again. Thank God for cell phones with the ability to send pictures and short videos. We are able to keep up to date on David's growth and his activities.

Dad's 87th Birthday
The third event this fall was Dad's birthday on October 18th. He turned eight-seven-years-old (87). What a milestone. His sister turned 92 on the same dad. We didn't do anything really special, just had a quiet day of football and special dinner, but he did receive numerous birthday cards and phone calls throughout the weekend.

If you haven't had the chance as yet, stop over at the Elder Care Cafe.net and check out what is happening. We are up to 266 posts at this time and still going strong. Lot's of changes there recently in the look of the site, but the same intent - to support caregivers and the elderly - is still of utmost priority. We celebrated our 1st birthday in early August. We had a birthday cake, balloons, and of course Beyer's sugar free pecan ice cream.

Just a quick update. Hope you get a chance to visit us somewhere on the web. We are still here although we don't post as often anymore.

Let us know what is going on in your life. We would love to hear from you and how you are doing with your care giving. Take care and hope to hear from you soon.

Dad and His Pals

Dad has belonged to the Masonic Lodge for many years. Although I do not agree with their beliefs, Dad has formed a number of strong friendships through the organization. Their fall season has arrived and Dad's meeting schedule has increased.

Because of his eyesight, he is dependent on others for rides. Although I am willing to give Dad rides to his meetings, he has a friend named Roger, who since last year has taken Dad to numerous meetings in our small town and to neighboring towns. This week Dad was at two meetings, one locally and the other out of town.

The reason I am writing about this on a site devoted to elder care is that I think it is important for Dad to get out of the house. He needs to interact with friends even though his eyesight and hearing loss prevent him from being as active as he would like.

Several of the guys at the temple quite often give him a ride home after meetings, but Roger has taken a greater step. He picks Dad up and takes him all over the place as they visit other lodges. By doing so, he has given Dad something to look forward to in an otherwise dull lifestyle since the loss of his wife.

This blog today is a thank you for all those who are willing to go out of their way to help someone who cannot do for themselves. Dad would love to be able to drive, to travel when and where he wants, but circumstances prevent him from doing so.

Because Roger is willing to drive out of his way to make sure Dad can visit others from around the area, Dad has something to look forward to. When he returns home he can think about the guys he talked to and the topics they discussed rather than sitting around feeling depressed because of his health situation.

That is a good thing! Thank you, Roger, and all others who are willing to take a step up and help an aging senior stay actively involved in his community.

The photo above is the Masonic Temple in Detroit.

What are you doing to help seniors stay active? What would you like to do to help out?

Senior Center Follow-up!

Yesterday's lunch was interesting and much more fun than I expected. We sat with a former next door neighbor who is now 91-years-old and as sharp as can be. He still drives and lives alone in a house that was originally owned by his great-grandfather. He is a history buff and vividly recalls local events from decades ago.

Another former neighbor, whose son is a year younger than me, also shared our table. During lunch, I received updates on where everyone was living, who is working where, and who is now retired.

Back in the days of my childhood, we attended a one room country school until consolidation sent us into town. I am glad for the experience as we had the opportunity to bond within our community that we don't have today. Our community was made up of dairy farms, with fields of corn, wheat and other grains sweeping the landscape. Several of the farms are still going strong.

It was good to hear of men and women I grew up with, how they are doing, knowing that at least one of their parents has lived to the upper eighties and beyond.

It was good, also, to be reminded of the good old days; of a time when life seemed slower and the days longer, the friendships tighter, and the future wide open.

Have you recently been reminded of days gone by? How did you feel about the memories? What, if anything, do you long for from your past?

Communications 101: Back to the Basics

Most of us tend to be social creatures. Emotionally, we need interaction with other people.

The week after my mother's funeral, Dad began attending Tuesday and Thursday senior lunch programs just a couple blocks from his home. He already knew several people who attended and has met many more during the past four years.

For a while he enjoyed the day trips offered through the Senior Center, but due to his eyesight he decided he was no longer able to attend.

That same week, he also purchased a motorized vehicle which enabled him to get around town. Driving himself to the dentist, barbershop, drug store, and several local restaurants gave him a freedom he had not experienced in quite a while.

Dad and his brother were born with limited eyesight. He attended the School for the Blind during his high school years. Dad was also color blind most of his life due to a childhood illness. He has not had a drivers license since his thirties and has had to depend on others for transportation for many years.

His travels around town, connecting with other people, provided him a social life he would not otherwise have enjoyed.

Dad belongs to the local Masonic Temple and has actively participated in their meetings as well as attended meetings in several neighboring towns. His fellow Masons provide rides to most of the functions. I tease him about his "guys night out", but I believe it has helped him after the loss of his wife.

Between the Senior Center and the Masons, Dad has something to look forward to other than sitting in his chair and watching TV or listening to his talking books. When I first moved in with him, I noticed his struggle with depression. Being actively involved in outside activities has brought him new energy and the opportunity to look to the future.

On another communication note: This afternoon I am meeting a friend at our local cappuccino spot for coffee and conversation. In her early 70's, she provides care for her eighty-five-year- old husband who has Alzheimer's. We met through a local writers group in the fall of 2006 and meet on occasion to chat. With mid-eighties men and a love of writing in common, we enjoy our time together.

We need our social time, whether we are the senior needing care or the caregiver in need of respite. Having a specific place to go, meeting new people or touching base with old friends, enlarging our circle and opening our minds to new and varied topics provides us the opportunity to keep moving forward.

As we age we are sometimes tempted to spend too much time dwelling on the past. Our social network helps us plan and anticipate, look forward to the next meeting, laugh, enjoy, and experience life outside the home, at least for a couple of hours.

If possible, reach out today and connect with a friend. You'll be glad you did.